Can we really create our own happiness?
After coming home from a long and hectic day from work place, my kids wrapped around me and insisted to have a shoulder ride. At first glance, it seemed to be a deadly task after a long-edged work day and of course with their growing age. But still somehow, I bowed down to their request and played with them for almost half an hour with no physiological pain or any mental stress hanging around me. For me, that was a moment of complete natural happiness.
Similarly for others, it may be
a shopping sight, having a party with your fellow- members, scrolling through
social media, going out for a movie, listening soft/ loud music, spending time
with your friend over a cricket match, getting your dream job or marrying to a
person of your choice; each person is well versed with the thought of happiness
and what brings that happiness for them.
From an academic lens view too, the two distinct approaches towards happiness, that is, eudaimonic happiness and hedonic happiness hold their unique pathways. Where eudaimonic happiness is purpose driven, and well-defined pursuit of a virtue and hedonic happiness is seeking for momentary pleasures and enjoyments.
In all the above circumstances,
the happiness is the outcome of achieving some desired outcome from a secondary
object. It is been outwardly pulled off. But in practical life, there may be
the circumstances devoid of stimulants providing you that happiness. I recall
of a famous quote “life is not a bed of roses”, but also a plethora of
uninvited and unexpected adversities too. In such circumstances, how to carve
our own happiness? What is the way-out that could help the individuals to
synthesis their own happiness?
A big appreciation to the work
of Prof. Daniel Gilbert, American Socio- Psychologist, who introduced the
concept of ‘Synthetic Happiness’, where one is the creator of its own
happiness. Synthetic happiness is not a fake, prejudiced, pseudo, or assumed happiness
but is as authentic as natural happiness, secreting same neurotransmitters,
according to the literature of neuroscientific studies.
Some of the tools to synthesize our own happiness
are listed below:
1. Regular exposure to sunlight:
Studies have shown that direct regular exposure of early morning sunlight to
one’s eyes from 5-20 minutes work as a catalyst in enhancing happiness windows.
2. Maintaining healthy
lifestyle: An individual can contribute significantly towards its happiness by
investing into balanced nutritious diet, sleep hygiene patterns, regular
exercise routines and NSDR (Non-Sleep Deep Rest) activities. The NSDR could look
different for each individual. For one, it could be a nature walk, for other
individual it could be a meditation practice and for any other it could be just
gazing at sky. Basically, any activity done in wakeful conditions but imparting
a sense of relaxation come under the domain of NSDR.
3. Practicing pro- social
behaviour: The pro- social behaviour could be any selfless behaviour with an
intention to help others without expecting anything in return, for example,
helping your neighbour with a baby- sitting or helping someone unknown to buy
the medicine or helping your friend in his studies. All the actions done under
the altruistic behaviour have been shown tending towards the higher happiness
index in various research studies done across the world. In Indian culture
there is a well-known concept of ‘dashmesh’, where individual donates ten
percent of his income voluntarily, without expecting anything in return.
4. Quality social relationships:
Spending quality time among your family members and loved ones seem to have a
direct impact on one’s happiness quotient but studies have also shown that even
trivial talks among known faces in the park, at the workplace or any social
gathering significantly trigger the emotional circuitry of the brain producing
happy hormones.
5. Pet care: In case, you tend
to have a natural inclination towards the animals, having a pet at your home
tend to increase in both physical and emotional wellbeing of individual.
Studies have shown that a physical contact with your pet effect in human’s pro-
happiness neurons.
8. Practicing gratitude and
forgiveness: Studies done in mental health and sleep domain have revealed that
the gratitude journaling done before just going to bed help the individual to
gain mental well-being and sound sleep, which itself contribute directly
towards one’s happiness. Gratitude for having a strong physical body, healthy
relations around us, and gratitude to Universe for beholding us have shown a
significant movement in neurotransmitters responsible for contentment. And
forgiveness is not accepting the wrong deeds done against you, but the power to
let go off the negativity surmounted around the wrong actions done against us.
The feeling of grudges or revenge in response to unfairness occurred to you
robs you off from the brain functions regulating affect.
9. Acknowledging and celebrating wins, no matter how small: Is
happiness only the end product of achieving your dream job or marrying your
romantic partner? Or it can be conceived even after learning a new dance move,
or arranging your cupboard, or serving a new recipe tried at home kitchen?
Probably, it is the cultural setting, where we are reminded of our flaws
frequently but not the achievements. There is a blindness towards our own
strengths, and we can unfold it by honouring them.
10.
Embracing positivity and positive people around you: With the result of
research findings, emotions are infectious, and when one is midst of
positivity, it helps the regulations of happy hormones in that individual too.
11. A
regular check on one’s inner dialogue: We are the outcome of our own thought
process. We grab the persona of the narrative that we set for ourselves. To
build up the inner happiness, one will have to create a joyous internal
harmony.
In
case of distress, one can build up happiness around him with the help of either
of suggested means. Elaborating all above tools at one glace does not indicate
towards owing them all during torment times, but just to adopt two to four
strategies out of elaborated tool box can help the individual towards
synthesizing its happiness.
Having
said that, we all know what makes us happy within the defined social norms, and
we can create that happiness, provided we carve out the time for the activities
that help us to attain our happiness!
posted by VALUE PLUS @ 9:09 AM
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