VALUE PLUS

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Sunday, February 09, 2025

Dealing with an emotionally unresponsive partner

This situation can be challenging and frustrating. Understanding their emotional barriers is crucial for a healthier relationship. Here is how can deal with such situation

Do a self-check first

Reflect on your own emotional availability. Are you truly prepared to enter into a relationship where you can be vulnerable and authentic? For instance, reflect on whether you have ever been emotionally unavailable yourself because of past experiences.

Communicate your feelings

Express your emotions using "I" statements to avoid sounding accusatory. For example, say, "I feel sad when we don't talk about our day," rather than blaming them for being unresponsive.

Understand the root cause

Identify the underlying issues that may cause emotional distance. Discuss your needs for emotional support and explore any unresolved conflicts that may be affecting your connection. If past disagreements linger, address them openly.

Resolve past disputes

Discuss any unresolved issues from the past that may lead to emotional unavailability. If a previous argument was never fully resolved, revisit it calmly to promote healing.

Create rituals for connection

Set up routine activities that build emotional closeness, like date nights or shared hobbies. For example, you can plan a monthly outing that you both enjoy in order to deepen your bond.

Understand your partner's needs

Understand what your partner needs. Engage in conversations around their likes and dislikes. Ask them how they love to be shown affection or support.

Give them space

Give your partner time to process his or her emotions without any pressure. Avoid ultimatums and respect their pace. If they need some alone time after a fight, then honor that need.>

Be Patient

Understand that change requires time for you and your partner. Be gentle in reminding them of your needs while giving them space to open up at their own pa

ce. Check in occasionally without forcing them to respond immediately

Self Care

Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Take a walk or spend some time with your friends to recharge emotionally

Seek professional help if needed

If progress stalls, consider coupleโ€™s therapy for guidance. A therapist can provide tools for better communication and help address deeper issues.

๐‘ฏ๐’๐’˜ ๐’•๐’ ๐‘ฉ๐’๐’–๐’๐’„๐’† ๐‘ฉ๐’‚๐’„๐’Œ ๐‘บ๐’•๐’“๐’๐’๐’ˆ๐’†๐’“ ๐’‡๐’“๐’๐’Ž ๐‘ญ๐’‚๐’Š๐’๐’–๐’“๐’†๐’”

๐‘ฏ๐’๐’˜ ๐’•๐’ ๐‘ฉ๐’๐’–๐’๐’„๐’† ๐‘ฉ๐’‚๐’„๐’Œ ๐‘บ๐’•๐’“๐’๐’๐’ˆ๐’†๐’“ ๐’‡๐’“๐’๐’Ž ๐‘ญ๐’‚๐’Š๐’๐’–๐’“๐’†๐’”

Ever wonder why some people rise stronger after failure while others feel stuck? The secret lies in how we approach challenges.

Here are 7 powerful lessons to turn setbacks into stepping stones:

๐Ÿ”น ๐‘๐ž๐ฌ๐ข๐ฅ๐ข๐ž๐ง๐œ๐ž ๐–๐ข๐ง๐ฌ โ€“ Every failure is a setup for a comeback.

๐Ÿ”น ๐Œ๐ข๐ง๐๐ฌ๐ž๐ญ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐„๐ฏ๐ž๐ซ๐ฒ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐  โ€“ See adversity as an opportunity, not a roadblock.

๐Ÿ”น ๐€๐๐š๐ฉ๐ญ๐š๐›๐ข๐ฅ๐ข๐ญ๐ฒ ๐…๐ฎ๐ž๐ฅ๐ฌ ๐†๐ซ๐จ๐ฐ๐ญ๐ก โ€“ Change your strategy, not your goal.

๐Ÿ”น ๐๐š๐ฅ๐š๐ง๐œ๐ž ๐†๐ซ๐ข๐ญ & ๐…๐ฅ๐ž๐ฑ๐ข๐›๐ข๐ฅ๐ข๐ญ๐ฒ โ€“ Push forward but know when to pivot.

๐Ÿ”น ๐‘๐ž๐Ÿ๐ซ๐š๐ฆ๐ž ๐…๐š๐ข๐ฅ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ž๐ฌ โ€“ See them as lessons, not losses.

๐Ÿ”น ๐๐ž๐ฏ๐ž๐ซ ๐’๐ญ๐จ๐ฉ ๐‹๐ž๐š๐ซ๐ง๐ข๐ง๐  โ€“ The toughest experiences hold the biggest lessons.

๐Ÿ”น ๐’๐ฎ๐ซ๐ซ๐จ๐ฎ๐ง๐ ๐˜๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ฌ๐ž๐ฅ๐Ÿ ๐ฐ๐ข๐ญ๐ก ๐ญ๐ก๐ž ๐‘๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ญ ๐๐ž๐จ๐ฉ๐ฅ๐ž โ€“ Your environment shapes your success.

๐Ÿ’ก The mindset you choose today will shape the success you experience tomorrow.

Saturday, February 08, 2025

How Can You Use Habit Stacking For Self Improvement

No matter how much you complain about your everyday mundane schedule, routine is also pivotal to brain development. As human beings, we are accustomed to so many activities, like taking the bus or tying shoelaces. Psychologists explain that without any recognizable pattern, life would become incredibly difficult. It would provoke tremendous anxiety because there would be no indication of what's coming next.

Habits are a part of the routine. Developing any new habit or skill requires motivation, repetition and consistency. Whether you are trying to sleep at a particular time or go for a run every morning, you have to do it again and again until it becomes a habit. Thatโ€™s how the brain builds new synaptic connections. It is also why we learn new things and adopt habits faster as children when our brains are still growing and developing and have the greatest neuroplasticity. One way of developing new habits is habit stacking. This practice takes advantage of the areas of our lives that are already automatic and reliable. It is a technique wherein you attach a new habit to the one you already engage in regularly and unconsciously. The basic concept behind this is that engaging in the already-existing habit will cue you to do something new.

1. Identify Your Current Habits Start by listing the habits you already perform consistently. These could include daily actions like drinking your morning coffee, brushing your teeth, or bathingโ€”automatic routines that serve as strong anchors for new habits. Donโ€™t forget activities you do regularly but less frequently, such as Sunday grocery shopping, monthly brunches, or weekly medical appointments. These reliable routines are also ideal for stacking.

2. Define the Habits You Want To Build Write down the habits youโ€™d like to establish. Whether itโ€™s making your bed, practising gratitude, or writing 300 words a day for that long-imagined novel, focus on small, actionable goals. While youโ€™ll begin with just one habit, thereโ€™s no harm in setting ambitious long-term goals.

3. Create Logical Stacks Pair your desired habit with an existing one in a way that feels natural. For example, if youโ€™re not a morning person, stacking a phone call with your mom during the school drop-off might lead to unnecessary stress. Choose combinations that fit your energy levels and routines.

4. Build on Success Once your new habit becomes automatic, layer another on top. For instance, if youโ€™ve established a consistent evening skincare routine, consider adding gentle stretching between toning and moisturizing to enhance your self-care regimen.

5. Use Rewards to Reinforce Habits If habit stacking alone isnโ€™t effective, incorporate rewards using the Premack principleโ€”a method of reinforcing desired behaviours by pairing them with enjoyable activities. For example, allow yourself an extra episode of your favourite show only after completing your meditation session. This positive reinforcement can help turn aspirations into consistent habits.

What is smart phone vision syndrome ?

Blurred Vision

The constant focus on digital devices strains the eye muscles, making it harder for the eyes to adjust or focus, resulting in blurry vision.

Neck and Shoulder

While using smartphones or other devices, poor posture develops by constantly looking down for prolonged hours, leading to neck and shoulder pains.

Headaches

Prolonged use of digital devices, forcing eyes to read small texts and more can fatigue the eye muscles, leading to eye strain and triggering headaches.

Eyestrain

This syndrome causes eyestrain due to prolonged exposure to blue light and harmful UV rays emitted by the phone, which leads to fatigue in the eye muscles.

Dry Eyes

While using smartphones, the reduced blinking causes the moisture to evaporate from the eyes, leading to dryness and irritation.

If you have one or two symptoms, please visit your doctor immediately.

Friday, February 07, 2025

8 simple office etiquette habits that make a big difference

Being professional: 8 simple office etiquette habits that make a big difference

When you fail to communicate clearly, take responsibility, or manage your emotions, everyday issues inevitably arise, impacting your professional relationships and performance. Miscommunication leads to misunderstandings, missed deadlines, and confusion, which can derail projects and cause delays.

A lack of accountability undermines trust and credibility, making colleagues reluctant to rely on you or collaborate effectively. Also, when you don't regulate your emotions, impulsive reactions or outbursts create tension, disrupt meetings, and lower the morale in the workplace. These unchecked behaviours result in a chaotic, stressful environment where productivity declines, teamwork falters, and your leadership is questioned.

Office etiquette can make or break your professional reputation. As much as your skills and expertise matter, how you interact, communicate, and collaborate within the workplace plays a vital role in defining your leadership qualities, says Dr Taylor Elizabeth, an Emotional Intelligence and Etiquette Coach. "Good office etiquette isnโ€™t just about showing respect for others, itโ€™s about setting the stage for smooth interactions, building trust, and solidifying your professional image," she shares.

Here are eight critical office etiquette rules that can improve your workplace relationships and contribute to your growth as a leader:

1.Respect everyoneโ€™s time:

Punctuality is a direct reflection of your professionalism. "Arriving on time for work and meetings shows that you respect othersโ€™ time as well as your own," Dr Elizabeth says. Make sure youโ€™re prepared and ready to contribute. Always be on time and avoid unnecessary delays, and take care to read through emails or instructions thoroughly before sending follow-up questions. If you need to settle in before a meeting, arrive a few minutes early. Also, be present during conversations, avoid distractions and multitasking during meetings or while talking to colleagues.

2.Mind your communication style:

Your communication style matters just as much as the content of your message. "Clear, respectful, and professional communication is a key component of any successful team. This applies to both in-person conversations, emails, and virtual meetings. Avoid gossip or negativity, and focus on constructive feedback and problem-solving. When disagreements arise, always approach them with a solution-oriented mindset and refrain from blaming others,โ€ explains Dr Elizabeth.

3.Manage digital communication:

The way you handle digital communication speaks volumes about your professionalism. "Email messages should always be succinct and to the point. Be mindful of your tone, whatโ€™s written may be interpreted differently by others," advises Dr Elizabeth. It's also important to check whether you can answer a question before asking for help. โ€œLimit personal device usage during work hours to stay focused and productive. Excessive use of personal phones or messaging apps can be distracting and unprofessional,โ€ she adds.

4.Maintain emotional regulation:

Managing emotions in the workplace is crucial for maintaining professional relationships. "Emotional regulation is an important aspect of emotional intelligence. When faced with strong emotions, take a moment to pause and breathe before reacting impulsively. Responding thoughtfully and calmly helps to de-escalate tense situations. By addressing conflicts respectfully and focusing on solutions, you foster a productive and positive work environment,โ€ Dr Elizabeth points out.

5.Dress professionally:

Your appearance plays a role in how you are perceived by others in the workplace. Dr. Elizabeth suggests that your attire should align with your companyโ€™s culture while still maintaining professionalism. "Dressing appropriately for the occasion and maintaining good grooming habits reflect confidence and help build your professional image," she adds. Physical demeanour matters too: sit and stand with good posture, make eye contact, and approach each interaction with professionalism.

6.Be accountable:

Being accountable for your actions and responsibilities builds trust with your colleagues and managers. "Reliability is a crucial component of a solid professional reputation. Meet deadlines, communicate proactively if there are any issues, and offer solutions if challenges arise. If you make a mistake, own it and work towards resolving it. A dependable individual will naturally be respected in any team environment,โ€ says Dr Elizabeth.

7.Respect shared spaces:

Whether you're in a physical office or working virtually, respecting shared spaces is important. "Keep common areas tidy, clean up after yourself, and maintain a professional environment," Dr Elizabeth advises. In a virtual workspace, mute your microphone when not speaking, and be respectful of other participants by being prepared for meetings and staying engaged. These small gestures go a long way in creating a positive and respectful atmosphere.

8.Show leadership through actions:

Leadership is not just about a title, it's about how you conduct yourself. "Leadership is about leading by example. Support your colleagues, offer help when needed, and contribute positively to the work culture. Demonstrating respect, integrity, and collaboration shows that you are capable of taking on greater responsibilities,โ€ Dr Elizabeth shares. The ability to lead by example will earn you the respect of your peers and position you as a natural leader.